The trick....

The trick to life is to like where you are, according to my meditation teacher

The trick is to like where you are.
The trick is to like where I am.
The trick is to like life.

Loud, long, fast

Someone broke a string on the violin bow. I asked Drew, my 12 year old, "Did you break the string on the violin. He replied in true deniable fashion, "It wasn't me. Drake saw me holding it, but it was him. He played it as loud as he could, as long as he could and as fast as he could and it broke. "

I actually believe Drew. My elder son does do things loud, long and fast. What energy and a true dicotomy-a Gemini by birth and style. I think of long and fast as opposites, but they certainly are not. Think of a fast marathon runner or a long, stressfilled fast car ride. One is slow but fast and one is long but seems to "last forever. " Time molds for people. Perception molds our health and wellness. How we see things changes our minds and we are in control of how we perceive. It takes work, as do all worthy things.

Tomorrow is Wednesday. My first day of meditation class at Parkpoint. I must go and of course I resist. Not tomorrow though. I insist.

I am quiet, long and moderate in my dealings. My job, now that I recoginize it, is to make the best of it. It is simply that simple. Be well.

Having children guru style.

Having children is a "double edged sword." I love them and fear them at once. They, as my worthiness and life's work, no longer lie within my control. It makes me crazy. Those baby years full of love and exhaustion wane and as the sweetness and cuddles move to gumpy pimples and driving, food and drug experimentation, and angst about life, I sit back and tremble for their safety and joys, acceptances and failures. I hate it. Give me freedom, an intervention to help me stop worrying because they still watch me and learn how to cope. And if I am stressed they follow. What a job I took on when I had these babes, wanting each and everyone of them so much and loving them more than I love myself. So, how do I stay well with these thoughts flowing through my little, but compulsive brain? I knit, write, work, walk and continue to wonder.

New Years is here bringing an opportunity to change. I resolve to be better step by step. I hope for more money, more fun, world peace, more joy, excellent health, better weather, cleaner air. You see where I am going. I have very high expectations for me, the world and consequently for the children I love. "Letting go" guru style seems to be key and perhaps this is the resolution I am looking for. Activating that part of my brain through meditation may save me, my kids and my world. Here I have the control I seek and it only entails sitting quietly and resting. Why is this so hard to do? It seems the simpliest of tasks.